Sunday, December 6, 2009

Music is What Feelings Sound Like


I am a violinist.

My sister is a violinist.

My mother is a violinist.

My Gammie (grandmother) was...no, still is in heaven, a violinist.

My Great Gammie was a fine pianist.

There are many more.


I came to this earth with music in the deepest part of my soul. Even as I sit here trying to think of words I am bound up with tears and can't seem to wrap my brain around what my heart feels when I play. That is why the tradition of music exists in me. That is why I am who I am and why I feel what I feel.

I get so anxious for Christmas time to come because I get to play my guts out in all sorts of events. I use to play in a Symphony and I miss it terribly. Some day I will return to that! I use to play a lot and right now, in this stage of my sweet life, I choose to be a mom, teach what I know, and share my talents when ever I get the chance. This weekend I got that chance and I got to feel what I love, love, love to feel!

I think everybody has a special place in their soul for good music. Music that makes you smile or dance or sing or cry. Sometimes I find that certain music just wants to burst out of me. Do you ever feel that way? Last night it was the Brahm's Cradle Song followed by a simple I am a Child of God. It's hard to explain.

The Maple Valley Christmas Creche exhibit is a big deal around here. The large main room is filled with at least 500 nativity exhibits and the walls are beautifully decorated with pictures of the Savior throughout his whole ministry. The music being played in the chapel is piped into the main room and listeners are welcome to sit and enjoy. As I stood on that stand and started to play I felt like I...well it's hard to explain...like I could have hopped right out of my skin and watched as my Heavenly Father played it for me. It was effortless and clean and the spirit of it completely represented what I believe this Christmas Season to be about. One reason I know that music exists is so that people like me...who can't seem to find the right words...can express what they really feel. I am not eloquent in speech or in writing yet. I don't always know what to say or how to say it but I have a really great outlet and am grateful for that gift.

My Great Gammie's legacy of loving and sharing music has been carried on by many precious women in my life and I feel overwhelmed and very honored to do the same thing. I think that traditions are meant to bring us closer to others. I feel like that when I play my violin.

6 comments:

  1. Your talent is such a blessing to me. I have always loved (except for the first few years maybe) listening to you play your sweet violin. I miss it! I know that wherever you are, you will bless the lives of those who hear you play "with the Spirit". They will be touched.... and yes.... You are a window to his love. :-)

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  2. Jenni, this is amazing! I just gave a relief society lesson yesterday on the 13th article of faith and finding those things that praiseworthy and virtuous. I wish I had seen this earlier and could have shared it with my beautiful Relief society. A lot of the girls in there need something like this to read adn lift their spirits. It amazes me the joy we can find in the simple things if we just look, listen and most importantly feel how heavenly father is portraying his immeasurable love for us. I Love you and believe me I cried reading each thing too! it must be a family trait! Keep it up. this idea of yours will touch and change many lives! tell you friends thank you for their entries as well.

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  3. We loved hearing you play! maybe if we end up close by you guys you cna put a little music in our kids souls! I think Garret has it in him I just don't know how to get him out of it

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  4. I totally get what you're saying, although sometimes I don't feel like a musician anymore. I have a 4 year old who cries hysterically when I play. So I don't play. And I miss it.

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  5. So beautiful! Thank you for putting "into words" all I feel in my soul but am unable to express. You are blessing so many lives because you are willing to give. Whenever we play, we give a piece of our spirit and sometimes that is a scary thing to do! Thank you for having the courage. Certain days are paydays for a mother... this is definitely one of them. I feel so blessed to be yours. And now on to your children.... Love you!

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  6. Jenni I wish I could hear you play. Especially around this holiday season. I will never forget the Christmas program that you helped pull off in Rexburg, ID.
    I can only imagine the spirit in that room the evening you played. You're so talented.

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