The hug that changed me

It was about 2 1/2 years ago that I answered a phone call from my dad. For those of you that don't know my dad, he's a man of very few words and usually listens in on the phone while I chat with my mom, and occasionally he'll chime in with a comment. So, to get a call specifically from him was at the least unusual. It turned out he had been diagnosed with chronic lymphocytic leukemia, and had been suffering the effects of a soccer-ball-sized tumor in his abdomen.

There was talk that he would have surgery to remove the tumor, but many of his lymph nodes had already started mutating into serious, untreatable ones. The doctor recommended immediate chemotherapy, rather than go through surgery and wait months afterward to start chemo. Every month, my parents made the hour-long trip to the clinic to receive an aggressive dose of chemotherapy. The days following treatment were miserable for my dad. He described it like having the flu...times 10.

Why share this with you when we're talking about love stories this week? I've always known my parents loved each other, although, like all of us, they experienced ups and downs of the daily stresses and celebrations in their marriage. I have noticed in my parents, since my dad's diagnosis and treatment, a much deeper love for one another than ever before.

(at our family reunion campout this past summer - aren't they cute??)

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At my mom's quilt retreat that same year, my sisters, aunt and parents were sitting around one night chatting and catching up. Dad's treatment had taken a toll on his energy, and he decided to turn in early. He stood up, said goodnight, and gave my mom a warm, lingering embrace that spoke volumes to me of their love. I've always known them to show affection toward each other, but this small moment seemed different somehow, more personal and meaningful, and I was thankful to have witnessed it.

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I decided that day that, whenever I felt the prompting, I would take an extra moment to let the dearest and most important people in my life know that they are loved. Just today, my mom said, "When you're faced with challenges and the future seems a little shaky, it makes you appreciate just what you have." Thanks, Mom and Dad, for showing me what true love really is.

A Family Love Story

I have this picture sitting in a cute tiny silver frame on my desk.  It is one of my most favorite items in my whole house.  I love to look at it and see in their faces how they adored one another.  These two cute love birds are my grandparents, Linton and Dolly Collier.  Their story is simple but I find simple things to be the most sweet.  They loved one another and we all knew it.  They loved everyone of us too. That's what suppose to happen when somebody gets married and starts a family.  That feeling should go on for forever.  

My grandpa passed away just a month ago after having a heart attack and I miss him....we all do.  He would always want to wrestle with us and give us big kisses.  He also loved to talk about his wife and would  sneak cute glances her way when he did it.  He liked to hold her hand and thank her for everything.  He was good to her and she was really good to him.  I don't know all of the details but I do know enough to share their love story and the way it has affected me. 

Both grandma and grandpa were raised in sunny California. My grandma had lots of cute girlfriends (including shirley temple...if I remember right) while grandpa ran around with my grandma's brother.  She had grown up right in front of him.  

Grandpa joined the Navy during World War II while my Grandma was in High School.  When he returned from his service he saw her as more then just a friend's little sister and asked her to dance.  He said "when I got out of the navy she looked very good to me!"  They courted for a year before they were married (the day after Grandma's high school graduation).  

After our family visited with  Grandpa just a few days before he died he told me about how my Grandma's parents didn't like the idea of him marrying her but they went ahead with it anyway.  He was stubborn like that.  Good thing because look how cute they are and how happy they made everything!  Plus my dad came from them and I came from my dad.  When you love somebody you just have to have faith and go for it...no matter what!

She wanted more then anything else to be a wife and a mother.  She moved with her family 7 times and one of them to a farm in Idaho.  They didn't know much of anything about farming but it was my Grandpa's dream so they took a risk and made the most of it.  My dad says she was the best cook and always kept a tidy home.  Grandpa couldn't sit still I guess.  He loved starting knew things and risking it all to start new businesses.  Grandma stuck by his side and did it all with him. 

They had three boys before adopting a baby girl.  They loved them, encouraged them and taught them well.  They believed in family.  They worked hard together and they played hard together.  When grand kids came along they seemed to like us...to love us and to want to teach us everything they knew. Grandma loved to teach us girls how to cook and Grandpa would help us climb his trees in the yard.  They would give open hugs and kisses to everyone both when we arrived for a visit and when we left.  We knew we were loved.  They showed us, they told us often and they meant it.

Grandpa's favorite date was the day he asked my sweet Grandma to marry him.  Grandma was always his secret crush and would be for forever.  

They never considered themselves to be poor. He said, "With each other we were and still are exceptionally rich!!!

 When Grandpa was asked, "If you could use one word to describe your spouse what would it be" he said,

"Outstanding, loving, caring, nurturing- take your pick!"  I guess he knew she couldn't be pinned down to just one word.

Grandma said that the one word she would use to describe her husband would be "GREAT!"

Grandpa noted, "My favorite vacations are anywhere I can be with my wonderful wife, Dolly. I love that lady! I even enjoy sitting around home with her!! God has truly blessed us!

Their advice: "Always tell each other you love each other daily and hourly. Always do everything together and be patient!"

I love that no matter what they stuck together, loved each other openly and made each other feel special.  They put their spouse first and their family close behind.  Their legacy of love and their story will stick with me for forever.  I love you Grandma and Grandpa! I want to end up like you...happy and content.

 

 

* I need to thank my cute sister in law Katie for helping me with this post.  In the short time she knew my grandparents she put together a book of each of their lives.  I will always love having a copy of those books.  Thank you a million times!

Costumes fit for Heros

Costumes can be fun.  They can also be super annoying.  Every year I force myself to wander up and down the dreaded costume aisles of Target and Walmart just hoping I'll find an original, not plastic looking costume for me or my kids and every year I leave with nothing.  The idea of making a costume seems time consuming and stressful but my hopes of having something original wins out...at least it did the year I did this:

Our little man was only 2 and my first thought was, "he can be anything I want him to be...he won't even know or care."  That wasn't going to be the case for very long.  I didn't sew much then and I was taking on the challenge of potty training at the time.  The more I thought about it the more I wanted it to have something to do with that time in his life and it needed to be simple.  We took on our roles and with a trip to the thrift store and some minimal sewing I transformed our little family into:

Under Wonder

(Master of Potty Training)

Complete with a cape the had CW on the back, and a headband made out of an old belt that said "Under Wonder" across the top.

Being the supportive and encouraging (full of bribery) mom that I was I became...

Positive Reinforcement Girl

(Under Wonders Side Kick and Encourager Extraordinaire)

What you don't see is my homemade clear plastic utility belt full of things like balloons, candy, stickers, bouncy balls, and rubber sticky frogs. All the kids we were with the night of this Halloween were instantly attracted to me...or to my belt.  I too had a cape that had PR on the back and some cut up socks for gloves.  Plus I got to crimp my hair and were neon blue pants.  When else do you get to do that!

and finally our villain was played by his Daddy...

Diaper Doom

 (Potty Trainings Worst Nightmare!)

 Mark's costume was fun.  He wore a lab coat and some awesome plasticy silver elastic pants, a black cape that had DD on the back and to make the costume complete a homemade diaper mask.  He was a trooper.  I don't think I would have ever worn that.  See why I love this guy?

So if you are annoyed with the whole costume world like me then it's time to get a little bit creative?  Take a deep breath, dream up something crazy and then go scavenge away in your own home.  All you really need is a few good capes and diaper mask and you could be just about anything!

We sure looked silly that year but I'm glad I did it when I could. The years that followed have been fun but nothing as memorable as the year Under Wonder and I we conquered Diaper Doom!!!

 

* This year I need some good ideas for a 5 year old boy pirate costume.  I have the basics but I want to snazzy it up a bit.  Thoughts?  Suggestions?  Links?

Three Sisters

Time for a special, overdue tribute to these lovely girls - my sisters. This is the best photo I have of the three of us a couple of years ago at my mom's quilt retreat. I can think of no luckier girl than me to have them for my best friends, cheerleaders, and psychiatrists. They're nine years older than me, so growing up, we didn't have much in common. Guaranteed that a 17-year-old and an 8-year-old doing something together for fun is rare, and in the event it does happen, it's usually an activity more geared to one or the other but not both.

In high school, the teacher would call role at the beginning of the year, see my last name and say "Are the twins your sisters?" They had paved the road ahead of me, and it was tough when I was trying to decide how to be me because there were expectations already in place. I don't know which is more difficult - repairing the reputation of your name (which I didn't have to do) or living up to it. I don't fault them for the challenge because it made me want to do better and be better. Now, as adults, the miles between us have expanded but the years between us seem to have narrowed. We can share meaningful, common experiences, and anyone who has a sister knows there's no match for this relationship.

Monument Valley, Utah is the location of a peculiar and distinct rock formation called "Three Sisters." This is how I picture us three girls. I always saw the one in the middle as me, the little sister, protected and watched over by my big sisters. Now I realize that perhaps we take turns being the little one in the middle, at times when one of us feels a little more vulnerable and in need of shelter and protection. No matter who's in the middle, there are always two others to stand tall on either side.

Thanks for everything, my sweet sisties!! I love you so much!